the sun shines outta my ass

from now on, i dont know you and you dont know me. sounds like a plan



on a clear day you can see forever. on a clear day you'd be able to hear me thinking about you.

a little birdie told me you love me and i believe that you do.

i dont mind guys staring at my ass cause one of them will come and tell me that they see the sun shining out of it.

i saw the sparkle of the sun in your eyes and then i saw the stars come out.

i dont know what to do, give up or keep pursuing you. theres this feeling inside my heart that im always gonna be loving you.


everytime i see you i wonder why you keep doing this to me? you have everything going for you, the world in your palm and everyone wrapped around finger. i know this may sound selfish but it seems like your just taking everything i have away from me, what little i have left anyway.

i wonder if you ever feel bad about what you do to me, cause i feel bad for what i did to you.

we only have each other, but im happy with that and i hope you are too

if life were to throw me a steak i wouldn't take it but when life were to throw me a bone, i'd bite at it then blame god for the lack of food and not giving me a chance in life. we all have our choices and make the decisions, sometimes we just make the wrong choice and then blame others for it so we dont feel bad about screwing up our lives.

there are those who start at the bottom and climb with every thing they got, with every minute they have just to get to the middle but most of the times its those who start at the top that fall to the bottom.

about time

its killing me to watch him turn into everything i've ever hated in a guy.

I can't even believe I'm bout to tell you this.
But it's like every since I've been with you things you know, just been changing.
Parts of me have been dying.
I just wanna tell you about it.


when he put his arm around me, the world around me came to a stand still.

Just understand what you have got here.
I'm the realist you gone find here.
I know you hear this all the time.
I put my heart and soul to mind.


guess what? i haven't thought about you all day.

Thought we was good, cooked me breakfast in the morning
She kept it hood, never trippin' on them shawty's
She get it poppin' whenever just how I want it
She did it all


yes, slowly i am forgetting you.

A permanent hole inside my heart
I wish I could've seen this from the start
Learned my lesson the harder way
Never gon' be the same again


you love him yeah? so please take good care of him. make him happier than i ever could or will be able to.

If you're here alone, baby, we're gonna have to change this
'cause you're sexy than a motherfucker
To get to know you girl I'd really love to
Get to show you a good time


i tell myself over and over again that things will be ok, but i cant believe it anymore

Wanna pull you close to me
And put my hands on your booty
I wanna show you a good time
And pop it off with slow grind


girl: you know what still gets me thinking?
guy: when you think about how close you were to being with him and not me?
girl: pssh no. i still wonder why when you're standing completely naked trying to seduce me, you still have your extra woolly thermal socks on.

I aint never had anyone make me feel this way
And my heart is sure it wants to be with you
Wanna give you the whole world
If you make the promise to me, You're gonna stay


its hard to believe how amazing we were, when now we're a disaster like this.

Did I have to fall in love with you.
I don't know.
Without you I can't function no more.
And you, will never look at me the same.


you were someone i thought i could trust, not like all those others that had disappointed me, turns out you were exactly the same.



p.s i was lying about not thinking about you

its you thats got me tripping.

you tell me that i hurt you, but what do you think your doing now? you put me in the middle and tried to make me choose, but in the end you made the decision for me.



he told me his love was mine, but then he gave whats mine away.



im getting closer to finding my place in this hell hole that we call life. i feel happy and its an amazing feeling =D



spotted: chuck bass losing something no one knew he had, his heart. that makes the two of us



when you super glue something to your skin in takes forever to get off and when you do manage to take it off it hurts like hell and leaves a wound which takes forever to heal. i think someone super glued you to my heart.



the most inspiring thing anyone has ever said to me. thank you :]
so my mind is left working overtime 24/7. love. what is love? I believe that a 15 year old girl can experience love. I do. but what you had with him, may very well have been a 15 year old girl desperately reaching out for someone, anyone, to understand her in a world that always leaves us so confused and clueless we all seek clarity. we all seek answers. we all seek a place. we like to know our place and hope to find happiness in our place. he was your place though, I don't know him, he may have abused that to get physical with you. he may have made you believe what you want, just so he could get a bit further. and I have a confession...buttering up girl's hearts is the easiest thing in the world. I have learnt that over the past 2 months. it takes something as simple as hold her hand. walking in front of her. holding her and telling her that everything will be fine. it's sad that girls will rush in. it's funny because deep down, I'm as sensitive as a girl so I understand their longing for their place in life, but guys are not the place to confide in, or hope for answers. we manipulate, we do whatever it takes because we have testosterone raging through our veins and bodies and he ends up thinking for us. the only way you can find true happiness is in accepting who you are and making the most with your life. Chickie spread your wings and fly on your own you are more than capable you can do incredible things with your life...if you believe that you can and that is the hurdle. stop reaching out to guys because you want someone to help you through life your girlfriends can be one of your biggest forms of support and a guy can just use you. live your life don't live out his fantasties because he is good at manipulating. ok? stay strong and be the best Chickie you can be :)



this aint sex, this is a symbol of the true makings of love. i really wish that was the case.



lets give it a go in the back of a car (Y)



i swear there was something in the coke last night cause i haven't felt like that in a long time.

cant figure out what to call this.

you know what keeps me going and keeps me satisfied? the fact that i have the one thing that she never will and have become so much more than they ever had.



i dont need to bitch about you, to make snide remarks on then net, to call you names and its because im bigger than that, i dont need to put you down to make myself feel better.



turn the music down, i want to hear your heartbeat.



if you were gonna chase me, i promise you ill run slow.



i was wondering last night right before i went to sleep what i miss you actually means. seriously, what does it mean. does it mean that your not happy with what you have now and would trade that for what you had before. or when you say it to someone that you want them back. what does it actual mean when you say it?



you know what pisses me off, that ive told you everything about me spilled out my heart, but i still dont know anything about you.


Stranger - Chris August
Stranger, til i hear your laughter
Crazy, cause your all im after
Its a pleasure, it was nice to have met you
Ill remember to never forget youuu
Cause when im excited
I dont hide it
Just to let you know
Im feeling you baby from bottom to the top
How could i not stop to say hello

So hello there
How are you
Amazing
Its nice to finally meet you
Been patiently waiting
Been waiting to just see you
To tell you i dreamed you
And now i found you
So call off the search
Cause i found my stranger



im waiting for my stranger. the guy that will take my breath away, the one thatll sweep me off my feet and take me away to try and finish off my disastrous fairy tale with a happy ending. im waiting for you to come along and take my mind off of him.



fuck man. im watching the "wedding date" and its such a beautiful movie. i cried at the part where she finds out that her ex was cheating on her with her sister. to make things worse she finds out that the people she trusted and loved knew about it and didn't tell her. movies and tv series fail to stop surprising me with how much they can relate to life.



i miss lying down with you. i miss holding your hand. i miss making you smile. i miss being the one that you think about. i miss not missing you.



i look back and it surprises me to see how much things have changed. how much people have changed. how much friendships and relationships change. how much your will power, determination and goals change.



its ironic how:
hello is always followed by goodbye
the good memories always reduce you to tears
forever never seems to last
friends can just leave you when your down
you'll still stick around when their down
when you need someone they're never there
people change and think they're so much better
many lies can be put in one love letter
one moment can cause so much regret



whats harder than loving someone is having the courage to let them love you back


"last night when we were fighting, i thought it was over and i was going to take off and leave you alone. but then i realised that id rather fight with you than make love with anyone else."



how come when the person you
love does something wrong you
never blame them? you forgive
them foolishly each time.



i still cry when i think about what a two-faced bitch you really are and how you pretended as if your cared about me and i fell for it.

rawr.

gossip girl episode 12
snowflake ball

N: did you do that to vanessa ?
J: yeah. you can understand though cant you, she
N: she what ? she lied, she went behind your back ? so what. for that she deserved to be publicly humiliated ? shes your friend jenny


fuck me dead.

Daniel Fernandez Never Again
Baby stop and think about it
Tell me where did we go wrong
How did it end like this
Can we work it out, I doubt it
We did all we could
And baby I can't go on like this
I never did you wrong your trippin'
Listening to your friends and all the bullshit they had to say
It's like they loved you more than I did
So baby roll with' your crew
And do what you gotta' do because

I never wanna kiss you again
Never wanna walk through the park holding your hand
No more talking all night until the early morning
It's such a shame to say that we'll never be the same again
Baby stop and think about it
You lied to me, lied to me
Baby stop and think about it
You lied to me, lied to me

The love we once shared girl no longer
It no longer remains and now it's harder, the pain because
She never really knew she wondered
Was she being untrue or was I being a fool because
I'm gone and I'm never coming home
So baby don't call cause I won't answer the phone
Stay out of my life baby just leave me alone
And it's such a shame to say that we'll never be the same

I never wanna kiss you again
Never wanna walk through the park holding your hand
No more talking all night until the early morning
It's such a shame to say that we'll never be the same... again
Baby stop and think about it
You lied to me, lied to me
Baby stop and think about it
You lied to me, lied to me

Girl you told me you'd be there for me
Promised that you'd never leave
You lied to me
You lied to me, lied to me


i know its talking about a girl but its a song that describes exactly whats going on. the only thing is im not sure of is which one of you im thinking of when i listen to this.

i am so pissed off, i hate you :] if i could i would punch you, the both of you.

its falling into place.

i havent blogged in a while but thats cause i couldnt be bothered. i guess i gotta get it out now :)

i realise now what he gave me that you cant. i realise now why you as my best friend isnt enough. i know now why i loved him.

i realised it today as we went through our normal after school wednesday routine. we sat at the steps waiting for my bus and for the first wednesday ever we didnt really speak to each other, we had an argument. as we sat in silence and my bus came i gave you a kiss on the cheek as usual because i didnt wanna just walk off. so after that i got up and you just sat there. there i was walking away but you didnt stop me. what wouldve happened with him and what i wanted to happen was that when i got up, youd hold my hand and take me back and hug me. then kiss my cheek and tell me it would be alright. i know everyone is thinking wtf, why would you want something like that with your best friend. its cause its normal. thats what usually happened, what it was supposed to be like but i cant figure out why it wasnt like that this time.

now im stuck wondering where we went wrong. not him, me and you. i swear to god we're drifting apart, we're not how we used to be. i dont even remember the last time i spent the night talking to you, or heard your voice over the phone. whats happening? you'll always be first in my world and now that im not first in yours, it doesnt feel the same anymore and i know thats selfish but i cant help it. i feel like its not us anymore, not how we used to be.


so for what its worth i miss us.