yo.

everybody nowadays is into that sheldon cooper guy from the big bang theory but i kinda have a bigger thing for the chick, shes hot.

it hit home.

this reminded me of who i actually am and it home that i shouldn't be like this anymore. i fucking love you moonira.

moonira says:
*behave okay? and remember your religion and faith. and know that even when everything seems like its going to fall and there is no body. i'm here.
*loveyou

isolation, the biggest relief.

you know it scares me to think that i could give up on myself so easily, that ive left myself in eternal misery and solitude.



so heres the breakdown. You hate me and i hate you. you bully me and i suffer in silence.



i wish i could draw evil, scary things to express my hatred and misery but all i can come up with is bunnies with big teeth.



and to think that you were someone who i trusted with my darkest secrets.



what happens when you dont fit in, when no one will stick up for you. who are you supposed to turn to?



Its hard to believe im too scared fall asleep because i dread waking up and coming to school. school's like satan in disguise, thats how much it scares me.



i'll slit my wrists if thats what it takes to stop this pain.



what i miss the most is being able to have someone to cry into for hours on end and have no questions asked.


i wonder if you know that you make my life a misery, i wonder how you could torcher someone to the point of wanting to be nonexistent

why is love so hard to find?

you're not my type and i think we both know it.

god that was such a waste of time and hope, you're so boring.

i expected more from you, i didn't think you could sink down to her level. but now that you have i have no more respect fom you

you bet i do.

cause now i can no longer turn to you.



you take advantage of the fact,
that i love you beyond the reason why




have you ever felt so alone and nothing makes sense? thats how im feeling and now im left standing here facing the world on my own with nothing but tear-stained mascara and a fake smile.



im not afraid of dying but i'm afraid of losing you.



and its hard to forget someone you know you'll always remember.



why am i still expecting so much when all i've ever gotten is so little.



is it just me or are we drifting apart?



all of us, we're all so miserable. we're all caught up in our own little world, with our own little problems and yet we dont fail to comfort others, to make time for those who need us, even when we're breaking apart. and this compassion, this is what makes us human.



do you think that when we're older we'll have more problems than now?



i have a plan. at the age of 70 i'm gonna go play paint ball and laser tag with my bingo buddies.

oh yeah, i forgot about that.

after reading this i'm pretty sure you're not gonna talk to me again but i have to let it out.



who am i kidding, i'm not over you.

i finally did it and im proud of myself :)

i guess life is too short that's why we gotta jump even if we do fall

"if its a guy that your crying over he's not worth it"
but he is worth it, i know he is.

why is it that i always end up thinking about us again?

its a war of words, death stares and egos

i hear that you talk about me, i just wonder if you think about me too

it hurts when you talk about her, all of the "hers" but i dont think you know it and i'm afraid to tell you to stop in case you stop talking to me altogether.

i'm too scared to think that i fit in cause i'm afraid like the rest of the world i'll be disappointed again.

keeping things close to your chest isn't a bad thing. i do it cause i'm scared that i might say something which will make me lose the little i have left

what happens when the one you love most doesn't love you at all? what happens when the only thing worth fighting for tells you to give up? what happens when i figure out that it'll never be the same again? what happens if i can never find someone like you?

thanks all of you that smiled my way, made me realise i'm not alone

i want to be able to wear short shorts this summer without feeling sefl-conscious, without people telling me i have fat legs, that i have a huge ass and laughing about it




P.S. I LOVE YOU NATALIE WARDLE. lol wardle lol penguin LOL

aye man

i can't be bothered finishing the stuff about my holidays so i shall just vent. no pictures though =\


im sorry i had to block you, i just needed space.

break the ice wont you? if you just said hi i would put the past behind and start again.

i miss seeing you, you made me feel normal. like i fit in.

so i sat there for the first time since we were there and it felt refreshing? i took myself back to the past and just let myself be imersed in the memories and the good times. i want to go back to when i was happy.

well there were these birds right and they fly in that arrow thing shape. there was a whole bunch flying like that and then one that got left behind. it didn't fit in with them or anywhere else and it just followed and tagged along. none of them stopped to help it along or looked back to what happened to it. that's how i feel. i don't fit in and i don't think i ever will.

its ok to cry right?

while i was walking along the road with tears streaming down my face, the sun came out. i looked up and i smiled the most that i had the whole day. sunshine makes me happy.

im falling even more in love with you.

i tried my best, but now i give up. ive done my part to get things back to the way they were.

i don't let you get under my skin and that means i win :]

having people care about you is someething people take for granted. then one day you see that theres no one that would run after you if you walked away. no one to come to you when you're upset. no one to wipe away tears when you're crying. no one that runs upto you when they see you. no one that cares.